Seven.

Dear Kennedy:

It is 12:37 am, as you can see from the clock above. It is the early hours of your seventh birthday. As I am writing, you are in the other room with your friends, watching movies and singing karaoke and dancing and giggling. It is the night (early morning) of your first-ever slumber party to celebrate your seventh birthday. Can you be seven already?

And I am struck with the thought: EXACTLY seven years ago you entered the world and our family. I don't think I have been awake any other year to usher in the exact time of your birth. But it doesn't look like I'll be getting much sleep tonight either, just like I didn't in the early hours of August 2 seven years ago.

I had labored all day with you on August 1st, a hot and sticky summer day. It was just 3 days after I turned 29...we even stopped on the way up to the hospital so that I could get my driver's license renewed (now THAT was a photo that I really didn't need to live with for the next 4 years!). I had been on complete bed rest for the last 3 months of our pregnancy, so I was ready to meet you. Despite the long labor, I only dilated to 2. So, right around 11:45 pm on August 1st, we made the decision to go ahead with a c-section to make sure you were safe.

It's not what I had planned. My plan included minimal intervention and lots of breathing and a vaginal "natural" birth. I didn't want an episiotomy (for sure) or any other surgical procedures. But God had other plans for our meeting, and I would not change anything about our decision. His plans are not our plans often...... and, truly, in the end it didn't matter how you arrived, only that you were safe and that you were now in our arms.

I'll always remember the first time I saw you and held you in my arms. You were squinting from the bright lights so I held my hand to shade your face to get a good look at those gorgeous dark eyes. You looked up at me almost in wonder....no crying, just looking. And that tiny little curl in your ear, I'll always remember that and how sad I was when your ear smoothed out. And that tiny little birthmark under your left arm. I noticed it right away as I tried to learn every inch of you, and you still have that to this day. Every time I see it, I smile because it reminds me how unique you are.

And the first time I nursed you.....it just felt good and right and natural. And watching Daddy bathe you. These are snapshots that are forever engraved in my mind. And the fact that while your first fews hours after birth were calm, you then SCREAMED for most of the night as Daddy and I--brand-new parents--tried everything we knew to console you. That is forever engrained in my mind.

You have grown into such a beautiful young girl. You are intelligent and curious and polite and kindhearted. You love animals and the outdoors and books and fashion. As of late, you are really showing such an interest in dressing fashionably and expressing your ideas in clothes and hair and jewelry. I love that you are exploring and being creative in this way. Most importantly, you have given your heart and life for Jesus and striving to learn and grow in Him. It was truly a life highlight when you and I laid in your bed and you prayed to ask Jesus into your heart....there is nothing better.

When I asked what it felt like to be seven, you replied "I'm not a princess anymore, I'm a cool girl!" While I love this spirit, please always remember that you will forever be a princess to God and to us. You will always hold a place of honor and innocence and wonder in our hearts. Girl, know that you can be a "princess" and a "cool girl" all wrapped up in one!

I don't really remember much about life before you. I know that I wasn't as busy and I also know that my heart wasn't as big. You caused my heart to swell with such love and pride and wonder at the person God made you to be. I want you to know that my life is richer and more colorful and deeper and more creative because of you.

You have brought singing and laughter to our lives....yes, and some whining, too, but nothing that we can't get through together. You create and dance and sing, and I love that you bring those things out in me, too.

We have certainly not been without our moments of conflict as you are exerting more and more independence. You see, I like to have my way, too, and I am just as strong-willed as you are. I'm sure that will challenge us even more as you grow, but I know that our love and communication and connection will see us through those times.....along with lots and lots of prayer!

I love that we are setting aside today just for the purpose of celebrating you. I love that the day has been filled with your favorite things......friends, swimming, art, family, jewelry, fun fashions for your room and closet, music, laughter, cake, and just being together. I love to watch your grace and your style growing. I love to see you pray and ask God to bless this day and every day. He has certainly made you something amazing.
Happy 7th Birthday, Sweet Kennedy. I love you to the depths of me and feel so honored to be a part of nurturing you to become all God has for you. You are a miracle, and the type of person that you are makes us all better people.
I pray that the year that you are seven years old is filled with learning new things, meeting new friends, experiencing new places and activities, nurturing your loves of art and music, being as healthy as you can be, and experiencing so much love that you feel totally wrapped in the arms of God and all of us, no matter what the year holds. You're beautiful. You're cool....and YOU ROCK!

Love,

Mommy