Reflections on Camouflage.

Parenthood is filled with what I call "pivotal parenting moments"--moments where you have to make a decision that has significant impact beyond that one decision. Example: Whether you choose to support your spouse's decision--whether you agree or not--communicates to your child whether you are united or whether you are divided, which, in turn, has important impact for how your child will or will not view you as a united parenting unit. This week, I had such a "moment" when out shopping with my daughter. A moment that I immediately knew could influence in a significant way our mother-daughter relationship and her self-concept development for years to come.

And it involved, of all things, camouflage. To say the least, camouflage (am I spelling that correctly?) is not my most favorite pattern....to me, it conjures up images of rednecks out hunting in the backwoods of northern Michigan. It certainly would not be my first choice for my beautiful 5-year-old daughter to wear. And such is the "pivotal moment".

My daughter and I were out on a "Mommy-daughter" date on Monday night, as we try to do monthly. That particular night, we were shopping for a new spring coat for her. As we looked through the racks at Kohl's, I soon spotted what I felt would be the perfectly adorable jacket for her.......bright pink with a large white and yellow daisy on it.....so sweet and cute. But, as I turned it around to show it to her, she already had another jacket off the rack, tried on, and she was smiling ear to ear...."This is the one I want, Mommy." And it was.....camo. Pink and grey camouflage with bright green sequins and pink trim. I showed her my bright pink daisy coat, but her mind was made up. Enter the mind of a Mommy of a little girl anxious to grow up and express herself more and more every day. "This is a key moment," I thought. Do I force my choice on her, or do I let her choose the coat that is her style and her preference?



















How many times had I spoke and taught of the importance of giving children their voice. Of letting them express themselves. Of letting them be who they are. Some things--like living for God and doing right and kindness and respect--are non-negotiables. But, to me, fashion--as long as it is appropriately modest and non-offensive--is one of those personal preference issues.....one should be allowed to dress to reflect their personal style and tastes. So, in the end, I took my own advice. We purchased the camoflauge jacket, with some adorable camo. Skecher flip-flops to boot. And, I must admit, she looks pretty darn adorable in her pink camo. clothes. When I see her in these items, I can't help but smile at the little lady she is becoming....a little lady with clear preferences and her own blossoming sense of style.....that definitely is more "camo" than it is bright pink daisies. You go, Girl....be who you are and don't let me stop you.